To Live and Die in Florida

Been visiting Dan (who's about to move out to Miami for college) and the family down in Florida. Although the trip hasn't been the most productive I've ever taken, I did get a good chance to write a few new jokes to try out when I return to doing The World shows at the Improv next week. One of my favorites is as follows:

"Most comedians have some revelatory moment when they knew they wanted to become a comic. Mine was when I was a little kid. I was with my grandmother in the supermarket. So, we're getting milk and she keeps reaching to the way back of the shelf. I say, 'What are you doing?' And she tells me that she wants to get the milk that has the latest expiration date. Thinking I was clever, I said, 'Wow, I wish you did that for grandpa. He'd still be here today.'"

If the story wasn't mean-spirited and completely fabricated, I think I'd try to get it into Reader's Digest so old women could cluck over how cute I am. Golly.