Bush Wants You To Know That Conception Starts At "Hello"
Good news, folks! The Bush Administration wants to define contraception – stuff like condoms, the pill... I don’t know, the rhythm method, I suppose – as “abortion.” That’s right – contraceptives kill the baby before they’re even alive, like cute little thought crimes.
“Wait a minute,” you just said. “Babies therefore would have a right to life before they even chemically exist?”
Hell yeah!
It’s good times to be the potential for a baby. Real good times.
But it will take some getting used to. So I’m once again pitching a few promotional posters to the Government’s Marketing Department, Washington D.C., United States of America.
“Wait a minute,” you just said. “Babies therefore would have a right to life before they even chemically exist?”
Hell yeah!
It’s good times to be the potential for a baby. Real good times.
But it will take some getting used to. So I’m once again pitching a few promotional posters to the Government’s Marketing Department, Washington D.C., United States of America.
posted by Mike Drucker at
10:17 AM
85 Comments:
FYI the pill CAN work as an abortifacient, if a child has already been conceived before the pill is taken, but not yet implanted in the uterus. The effects of the pill make it impossible for implantation to occur.
Who the fuck cares?
What possible difference can this make to you?
A barely differentiating bag of cells got flushed to the sewer and you're going to have some hissy fit over it?
Go out and serve the poor you fucking hypocrite.
"a barely differentiating bag of cells... And you're going to have somidsy fit over it?"
you know he's not agreeing with bush right?
He's making fun of the idea
LOL calm down
Some people have never heard of satire, heh.
Wow...that one is high on our priority list...
Screw world peace, the war on terror, and the US economy...contraception is more important right now!!!
Of course, if Bush was wanting to skirt Roe V. Wade, as he does with every other law and without having to go through the Supreme Court, this would be the way to do it.
Oh, and I guess by definition, masturbation would be considered abortion as well.
I'm doing my part in preventing unwanted birth. I tell all my ladies that booty call is the way to go!
remember, the internet is serious business...
The pill does not prevent fertilization. The case where the woman was taking it before hand is identical to what anonymous describes.
If you read the New York Times article, you'll see the bill is not classifying ALL types contraception as abortion, only those which kill the embryo after conception. Things like the pill and IUD work this way. Condoms WOULD NOT fall under this definition.
While I'm not a pro-lifer (or Bush sympathizer), at least the administration's position is consistent: if life begins at conception, anything that ends it after conception is abortion.
If the Administration's position was consistent, they'd be anti-death penalty, and anti-war as well.
Their position is incredibly inconsistent. It's weird to see somebody claim otherwise.
"Things like the pill and IUD work this way. Condoms WOULD NOT fall under this definition."
So basically what you're saying is that any birth control that the woman uses = bad, and any birth control the man uses = good.
I can't wait for Bush to decree that all women have to wear headscarves or that if a woman is raped she's guilty of adultery.
I guess all that time he spends holding hands with Saudi royalty has converted W to Islam.
Insha Allah, y'all
Aren't the Bushies in the "Except in cases of rape or incest" on the abortion issue? Apparently babies that are conceived under embarassing or unpleasant curcumstances aren't really babies, so it's okay to abort them.
Abortion is a hot-button issue with many many conservatives. Bush got a lot of votes simply on this one issue.
And then didn't do a damn thing about it.
I guess this is his last-ditch effort to fulfill some of his campaign promises.
Also, there will be a base on the moon and a man on mars real soon now. Oh, and the peace in the middle east thingy is almost ready.
Most fetuses which form are aborted by the mothers body before she knows she's pregnant, during the first few days. Should we include that in infant mortality statistics?
"FYI the pill CAN work as an abortifacient, if a child has already been conceived before the pill is taken, but not yet implanted in the uterus. The effects of the pill make it impossible for implantation to occur."
It CAN, but it usually doesn't. There is a minuscule risk that the birth control pill could prevent implantation, but it's exceedingly rare. Medications like Vioxx also carry this risk. So if you don't want people to use birth control because it can theoretically cause an abortion, you shouldn't want them using Vioxx (and several other medications) either. But you'll never hear the religious right campaigning against Vioxx. I can't help but think they're just against sex without consequences, rather than actually being against abortions.
The cock block poster is pure gold. If only someone had cock blocked the entire bush family. Time travelers, I'm talking to you!
"Most fetuses which form are aborted by the mothers body before she knows she's pregnant, during the first few days. Should we include that in infant mortality statistics?"
Yes. And have little tiny funerals. Every time I have a period after a month in which I have had intercourse, I hold a wake, and drink copiously, just in case I expelled a fertilized egg.
(No, just kidding. Really.)
I hope the next step is making menstruation illegal because it is an abortion technique perpetuated by females. Oh, oh, and they could arrest all the chicks and put them in baby making farms where they forget a life without pregnancy!
Is it against the law to not save a life? Is a woman required to "catch" the fertilized egg? I don't think it's illegal to let someone, who jumps out of a building, hit the ground.
So is an embryo, not yet implanted, alive? WOW. All those women getting deported should claim to be pregnant. The US cannot deport a US citizen, right?
So is an embryo, not yet implanted, alive? WOW. All those women getting deported should claim to be pregnant. The US cannot deport a US citizen, right?
This is actually an interesting take on things. I'd love to see this happen.
Bush is an idiot. Who cares what Dictator Bush thinks.
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You know what else? I think we should classify miscarriages as abortion too. Now, lets round up all the nasty women who've had abortions and put those motherf*ckers in jail!! Better yet since they're killing "life" lets put them up for the death penalty.
Ahh good 'ol Bush. Sending grown babies to die in war but saving all those poor, innocent little fetus' so there will be future people to send off to war. What a hero.
This argument is all so f-ing stupid it infuriates me. Babies do not have a rights and therefore do not have a right to be born. ADULTS have rights and adult women should be able to chose how they want their life to play out, period.
As far as I'm concerned all those who are anti-choice should have at least one adopted child.
Peace
You sorry ass liberals don't even see wit and satire when it splats in your face. Get over it, Bush isn't seeking a third term. He's not running now. Its BO and that other guy? John F'n Keary, get a clue, willya?
You also make some against Horse Back Riding, Smoking and Drinking.
All of which can result in an unexpected (even undiscovered) termination of a very early pregnancy.
Something that I'm not sure If I've saw, but in regards to the jest about menstruation eventually being outlawed (under the slippery slope argument), whether an egg is really alive, and any other similar things that concern unfertilized eggs leaving the body.
Remember that an egg is just essentially a unit carrying 23 pairs of chromosomes. It's not a baby, it's alive just as much and no more than skin cells or plants and trees, because it exists and is supported by the body.
Only when a little swimmer makes it into the egg and successfully transfers it's genetic material does the egg have "human potential"...IE all 46 chromosomes. Still, at that point it is just a unit of chromosomes working on building a little body and little nerve endings.
I am not a bush supporter and I think this bill is ridiculous attempt at trying to control sex and how we do it and how we don't.
This isn't satire. It's true. They're trying to classify contraception as abortion so that insurance providers can use that as an excuse to deny covering it.
The posters are awesome. Truly. But they cannot compare to the joke that is that memo.
"Aren't the Bushies in the "Except in cases of rape or incest" on the abortion issue? Apparently babies that are conceived under embarassing or unpleasant curcumstances aren't really babies, so it's okay to abort them."
You consider rape and incest to be only 'embarrassing' or 'unpleasant'? How about your male relatives all bend you over and take turns dicking you and you can see if you only feel 'embarrassed' and 'unpleasant' or if you feel physically defeated, psychologically traumatized, and emotionally wounded? Insensitive fuck...
Babies deserve propane torches and gliders. The first baby that figures out how to combine the two into a rocket plane gets ten dollars.
I strongly believe this.
funny enough . . . a LOT of the women I know are recently getting into open relationships with each other forgetting that men exist period . .. wonder if this kind of thing is fueling the fire more
Jessica:
"if you feel physically defeated, psychologically traumatized, and emotionally wounded? Insensitive fuck..."
So your argument for the exception of killing babies in this case is because the woman has been hurt, so automatically the babies must die for it.
No. If you are claiming that pills kill babies, you are also saying that it is ok to KILL a baby if the special circumstances are ok.
Would you kill the baby after it is born? No. So either the pill does not kill it because it wasn't there, or you don't kill it when you are raped, or you are a baby killer.
its different.
This isn't surprising. Earlier this week John McCain was questioned about his thoughts regarding the lack of fairness possessed by health insurance companies that cover Viagra for male patients, but don't cover birth control for women. He couldn't even respond because supposedly he "didn't know enough about the issue to comment at the moment."
It makes sense, no? Let's give men the ability to get/maintain an erection so that they have more control of their sexuality, but not provide women with the equal sexual freedom of being able to afford the means to protect herself from unwanted pregnancy. Because their aren't enough single mothers living on welfare right now, struggling to put food on the table and pay the bills.
I'm a 25 year old single woman on the pill. I pay huge health insurance premiums every month. Don't I deserve to be able to afford a pill that keeps me from adding to the population before I'm ready to be a mother just as much as some 48 year old man deserves his woody?
If the government wants to use the "nature" argument and say that birth control pills are killing babies that would have otherwise been born, think about this:
Viagra goes against the NATURALNESS of erectile dysfunction. If menstruating women are going to be robbed of their ability to independently have control of their own reproductive destinies, then older men who wouldn't be having sex without their Viagra prescriptions shouldn't be given a drug that could result in the birth of children that mother nature did not intend for them to father in the first place.
Notice how most of the people making these rules about female forms of contraception -- are men. Rich men who don't benefit from providing equal rights and benefits to those outside of their tax bracket.
Wow you guys just jumped right on the bandwagon. The memo (not authored by Bush btw), does not criminalize or redefine any laws regarding birth control. It just states that clinics cannot discriminate against doctors based on their belief on abortion. In other words, under the terms of the memo, it would provide MORE variety in the advice of medical professionals, and access to MORE opinions/options to the woman.
Why is everyone so quick to judge? Take a moment and research the memo. You say "they're trying to destroy a woman's right to choose", when in reality they are just ensuring that doctors don't have to stifle their own beliefs in order to be hired.
I guess the idea of promoting our right to believe whatever we choose, and not be discriminated against for it frightens people....Unless you choose to be gay, or pro-choice....then it's ok.
I can remember going to a party with my dad & coming home with my mum.
Therefore life begins at eye contact.
@Anonymous
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having kids is hereditry. if your mum and dad didn't have any chances are you won't either.
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PS nice post. I like fun. some of your readers don't see the irony though do they?
What I'd like to know is how many anti-abortionists have adopted children from poor women who live in desperate conditions?
"The pill does not prevent fertilization"
Yes, actually, it does, or rather, it prevents ovulation, so that there is nothing to fertilize. The case in which a woman taking hormonal birth control ovulates anyway, the egg is fertilized, but it does not implant as a direct result of the BCP, is vanishingly rare.
This is actually true tho I dont think it's to this extent. The law actually says that things like day after pills and other after conception drugs/procedures count as an abortion. However, it also ends government funding for any practice, hospital, or parenthood planning center that offers these birthcontrol methods. This means that not only is our healthcare suffering, pregnant women are being told the wrong thing in an effort for the doctor to keep the governments' fundings. It also means that doctors are allowed to either give or refuse to give birthcontrol acording to their own opinion rather then facts or for the patients own well-being.
I don't support abortion but reading comments from so many idiots here I have changed my position!
Here's my argument to Bush and his ilk on this issue:
Polar bear females, once they have mated, need to find as much food as possible and FAST. If they do not, the embryo will not implant and is reabsorbed back into the body.
Citation: http://www.bearinfosite.com/polar_bear.htm
If God does not like abortions, why does it occur naturally in other species?
I was going to have an abortion, but my mom got scared And said, "You're movin' with your auntie and uncle in Bel-Air."I whistled for a cab and when it came near The license plate said fresh and it had dice in the mirror If anything I could say that this cab was rare But I thought, "Nah, forget it. Yo home to Bel-Air!" I pulled up to the house about 7 or 8and I yelled to the cabby yo holmes smell ya later Looked at my kingdom I was finally there To sit on my throne as the prince of Bel-Air.
Ah yes, another misguided attempt to rally the mouthbreat-- err I mean base.
Can you just imagine heaven filled up with all those little invisible zygotes that never had a chance! Shit, I bet you can't even see Jesus, what with all the zygote fog that must envelope him. Ha, and you thought those were clouds God was lounging in! I wonder what blastocysts talk about?
@brad
You, Sir, are retarded. You can hold your beliefs, but if your beliefs mean I will be discriminated against, you have a right to hold your beliefs in a mud-soaked shit filled gutter where you belong.
Keep your laws off my body!
Implantation is the hard part of getting pregnant and 9 times out of 10 it doesnt happen. And you know what? If the fertilized egg doesn't implant, you failed to get pregnant. Meaning you were never pregnant at any point. Ask any woman who is trying to concieve. Unsuccessful implantation results in a failure to get pregnant.
I'll put this in clear terms for the negative-IQ pro-lifers: You have to be pregnant to have an abortion! Preventing pregnancy does not equal an abortion. Your attempts to portray blocking implantation as if its an abortion are what make your position cross the line into saying that pregnancy-prevention is an abortion. Hence everyone is now flying off the handle mocking you. Because you are actually being that idiotic.
I would have to say that Brad is a dumbass, and lost no time in proving that so.
Wow, I'm glad I live in England where I can kill as may babies as I like. In fact, you can get a government grant for it in some areas, like Liverpool and Bradford; they pay you a small fee to impregnate a woman then either make herdrink bleach or boot her good and hard in the guts until she haemorrhages. *sings* God save our gracious Queen...... Makes you proud to be British
Third wheel? I think not! If he were really doing God's will, he would impreganate them both so that both could raise Christian children to serve Christ's purpose.
The godless Mooslems are over populating the world with hate-filled suicide bombers who believe the rantings of a war-mongering pedophile.
WAKE UP CHRISTIANS. We are about to be over run by these turbaned sand monkeys.
ARE YOU DAFT? It's not the Muslims we need to fear, but the Jews and the Chinese.
The UN and the Global Press Association have not dealt with this unholy alliance out of fear of both: the Jews will cut off funds and the Chinese will ruthlessly assassinate those who dare to tell the true story.
The Muslims are merely stooges, pawns, to be played and sacrificed by the more powerful consortium of the Jewish/Chinese states!
dont quit your day job..this is hardly funny.
and liberals glomming onto a bush bash..whoa,who'd a thunk it.
I do have to say that i support pro-choice. I do enjoy the satire of he posters, it is rather on the hilarity scale.
"To all the ladies having babies on their own, i know its kind of rough and its kind of lonesome, the father's long gone...You can't help this, dealt with this hand, without a man" -Tupac "Keep Ya Head Up"
This quote by rapper, Tupac, is a rather decent portrayle of single mothers. Left alone, the daddy is gone, and you have little to now family to lean on. The woman is not ready for a kid.
"In the United States, 1.3 women are raped every minute. That results in 78 rapes each hour, 1872 rapes each day, 56160 rapes ech month and 683,280 rapes each year." from the URL http://oak.cats.ohiou.edu/~ad361896/anne/cease/rapestatisticspage.html
That is just disturbing. When people say in "rare cases for rape", 1.3 women are raped every minute.
"83% of rape cases are ages 24 or under.
1 in 4 college women have either been raped or suffered attempted rape." Now, girls under the age of 24, we are talking just out of college or a few years out of college, how many people have debt after college? And now the possibility of a kid is thrust upon them?
I am not giving a full report, but I would like to give my two cents and some backup to my position. Thank you.
99% of the people in this thread never even read the memo, yet I am the moron.
It does not stop federal funding for clinics offering these services. It just recognizes that people have differing beliefs on abortion, and some could see the pill as abortion since a fertilized egg can be potentially flushed out of the system. This bill would prohibit clinics from discriminating against doctors and medical professionals for that belief. It would also say that the government cannot approve or deny funding based on that criteria. read the memo.
I never said there is anything wrong with being gay, or pro-choice. In fact, I am pro choice myself. I just find it funny to see all this outrage over a bill designed to protect the individual's right to privately held beliefs from people who believe strongly that private lifestyle choices should not effect public life. Presumably you would agree you should not be discriminated against because you feel life begins at birth. isn't it only fair that others who disagree get the same respect? Does no one else see the irony here?
The Pill CANNOT work as an abortifacient in any sense of the word.
The Morning After Pill is a double dose of birth control, all it does is stop conception from occurring if it hasn't already happened, if it has, then it can't do a damn thing.
This is coming from a Sex therapist/Sexual addictions councilor. It's not considered abortion if the fetus doesn't even exist.
Absolutely wonderful post by the way, I'm stealing two of those pictures, I'll link back though.
When did people get this freaking nuts over the concept of preventing implantation anyway? Hormonal contraceptives and emergency contraception don't even do that. All the evidence indicates that the only thing they do is prevent ovulation and fertilization. Back in the 60's and 70's when these things were first developed, the product marketers took the double negative approach to that fact, saying you can't prove it doesn't block implantation either, so maybe we can say it possibly does and make our product sound that much more effective. Because back then people were normal and blocking implantation was viewed as a positive thing in the goal of preventing pregnancy.
Now IUD's are actually proven to reduce implantation, in addition to blocking fertilization. Its one of the reasons they work so well. Perfect use of pills is about 98% efficacy, while perfect use of IUD's is 99.6%. The extra mechanism of blocking implantation is detectable there.
This bill does not protect people's rights to privately held beliefs, it protects the rights of some to infringe theirs on others. If a store owner wants to open up a contraception-free store, well thats his store and business. But a pharmacist with an actual successful business plan, should be free to sell contraceptives and hire employees who further his goals. Except now he's not allowed to. This bill requires that all pharmacists do things the way christians want them done. Instead of finding employment at a store that doesn't sell contraceptives, a "christian" doctor gets to go to the contraceptive store and say neener neener you have to hire me so that I can refuse to sell people's prescriptions and get paid by you for tanking your business. Why isn't it enough for the christians to just open their own stores and leave the rest of us sane people alone to do our thing? Read the memo again, brad. Its refusing to fund any business that expects its employees to do what they say, if its to sell contraceptives. If not, then anything goes. Thats not equal opportunity, its discrimination.
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sorry karen, you are simply wrong.
"“Abortion” means any of the various procedures—including the prescription, dispensing, and administration of any drug or the performance of any procedure or any other action—that results in the termination of the life of a human being in utero between conception and natural birth, whether before or after implantation."
says nothing about any product that works prior to fertilization. In other words, it only defines it, for purposes of that document only, in a way that means anything that terminates a pregnancy post conception.
"Entities to whom this subsection x.3(c) applies shall not:
(1) discriminate against any member of the workforce in the employment, promotion, termination, or extension of staff or other privileges because he performed or assisted in the performance, or refused to perform or assist in the performance of a lawful sterilization procedure or abortion on the grounds that doing so would be contrary to his religious beliefs or moral convictions, or because of his religious beliefs or moral convictions concerning abortions"
As I said it protects individual beliefs....on both sides. Now if you would like to read the actual memo it can be found here.
http://www.rhrealitycheck.org/emailphotos/pdf/HHS-45-CFR.pdf
specifically pages 30-38. Please find anywhere in there that it states it will deny funding for legally provided services, or restrict access.
"It just recognizes that people have differing beliefs on abortion, and some could see the pill as abortion since a fertilized egg can be potentially flushed out of the system."
Belief does not necessarily equate to truth. The TRUTH of the matter is it's NOT abortion. I know there are plenty of people in this world who "Believe" that child molestation/abuse/murder is perfectly okay. That doesn't make it true. There is no religious/belief system on earth that could possibly justify those things, right? Would you support a bill that says doctors with the belief to abuse their patients are ok? I mean if they are Christians it's ok, right? UH... how about NO? How about we all support a memo that says that Doctors who deny women birth control are abusing women because I can't think of any more fitting defintion for "abuse" than forcing pregnancy on someone.
Christian. Muslim. Jewish. Atheist. I don't give a shit what your religion/belief system is. Keep your laws out of my uterus!
Uh, the circumstances under which the pill can cause a spontaneous abortion are mostly /theoretical/, and even so, the cause for the spontaneous abortion in the first trimester can't really be proven to be natural or HBC caused, as something like 50% of all pregnancies spontaneously abort before the mother even knows she's pregnant.
So, basically, a small, rare, possibly non-existent side effect (preventing implantation) that has yet to be really proven in the scientific community is going to keep a medication that prevents ovulation and has other health benefits marked as "abortion" so as to restrict its access?
Please get some learnings before you start trying to legislate my body.
If you read the New York Times article, you'll see the bill is not classifying ALL types contraception as abortion, only those which kill the embryo after conception. Things like the pill and IUD work this way. Condoms WOULD NOT fall under this definition.
The pill DOES NOT in most cases kill an embryo in the rare case of conception. It's "abortifacient" properties have yet to be really scientifically proven.
I don't care if its consistent, it's fucking backwards.
I like how he's taking one last stab at the country before getting the hell out of office . . . *sigh*
While this proposal is making a valiant effort to protect anti-contraceptive religious beliefs of doctors and pharmacists, perhaps they don't deserve to be protected.
A doctor has every right to refuse to prescribe birth control. However, a hospital or medical practice should not have to hire them just like they shouldn't have to hire doctors who won't prescribe flu medication because they believe in the power of prayer to cure it.
A pharmacist has no business asking why a person needs a certain medication. Their job is to fill a doctor's order. Period. Birth control pills treat a number of conditions and are often used in non-contraceptive ways. A prescription for birth control could be for polycystic ovarian syndrome, PPMD, or menstrual-related anemia. The pharmacist is not there to be answered to by the patient. The doctor is.
abstinence is abortion? you do realize that using contraception is the opposite of abstinence, right? good one, though...
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