How I Spent My Minnesota State Fair Vacation
Oh, boy! During the Republican National Convention, I also went to the Minnesota State Fair! You should of been there, because then we could have made out behind the booth selling Jacuzzis. I would've started gentle and then ramped up into full-faced smooches, boy, I would.
My favorite part of the Minnesota State Fair was the butter sculpture competition. You see, every year, Minnesota awards a woman with the world's most backhanded title: "Butter Queen." This lady, often at the peak of her depression, gets her picture taken and butter sculptors interpret her face in creamy, rich butter.
Many of the sculptures this year were fantastic!
Wow!
Gosh!
They were all very good. But one stood out amongst the many! One Butter Sculpture was so good, it needed to be capitalized. And that was the sculpture from Wadena County!
Yes! Yes! Yes! USA! USA! USA! They stapled her headshot to a block of butter. BAM! That's American ingenuity! Woo! We win! Ignore the static and the noise, boys!
Of course, a trip to a state fair wouldn't be complete without some merchandise. And I think I found just the perfect gift for any lady at work:
It's just the perfect shirt. Not creepy or weird. If I got it, I'd wear it today. And that's good because I'm naked!
My favorite part of the Minnesota State Fair was the butter sculpture competition. You see, every year, Minnesota awards a woman with the world's most backhanded title: "Butter Queen." This lady, often at the peak of her depression, gets her picture taken and butter sculptors interpret her face in creamy, rich butter.
Many of the sculptures this year were fantastic!
Wow!
Gosh!
They were all very good. But one stood out amongst the many! One Butter Sculpture was so good, it needed to be capitalized. And that was the sculpture from Wadena County!
Yes! Yes! Yes! USA! USA! USA! They stapled her headshot to a block of butter. BAM! That's American ingenuity! Woo! We win! Ignore the static and the noise, boys!
Of course, a trip to a state fair wouldn't be complete without some merchandise. And I think I found just the perfect gift for any lady at work:
"Coming Soon Have Patience God's Not Finished With Me Yet."
It's just the perfect shirt. Not creepy or weird. If I got it, I'd wear it today. And that's good because I'm naked!
posted by Mike Drucker at
2:04 PM
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